Mistake 1: Haven’t Figured Out How to “Love Me Some Me”
In order to attract love into your life, it’s important to improve the relationship you have with yourself. If you love yourself and have confidence in who you are, then you will begin to send a signal to others that you have value and deserve respect. An improved sense of self will lead you to a more fulfilling love life loving yourself first sends a clear message that you are to be recognized, celebrated, appreciated and loved. If you don’t truly know yourself and what you want out of relationship, how can you attract the right man into your life? Before you can truly know what you want out of a relationship, you have to have a sense of what your needs and wants are and what truly makes you happy. Commit to developing a relationship with yourself. Learn to say no to others so you can spend more time learning and meeting your needs. Commit time to doing things that you enjoy that are just for you. Make yourself a priority in your life!
Mistake 2: Spend Their Best Years Pursuing an Education and Career Goals Not Realizing that Their Strongest Assets (e.g., Looks, Fertility) Decrease With Age
A woman who wants to have a family should capitalize on her looks, age, and fertility while she is young instead of only focusing on chasing the high-powered career. I believe (and of course I could be wrong) that a man would more likely be with a young, attractive woman that is less educated and makes him feel good (in terms of stroking his ego) then an average looking woman with a great career and education.) If marriage and having children is important to you, you may want to NOT focus as much time on pursuing your career goals, but spend more time pursuing and developing meaningful love relationships while you’re young, perky and fertile. If you want a husband and family, you have to pursue it with the same focus and attention you did to achieve your career goals, and by all means, don’t let you looks, fashion sense, and overall attractiveness go downhill. Note: In my book, Why I Love Men: The Joys of Dating, I share insider secrets, practical advice and techniques that any woman can use to maximize her physical beauty without cosmetic surgery, because as shallow as it may sound, how physically attractive you are is very important to men, and should also be to you if you are seriously looking to attract and keep a man.
Mistake 3: Waste Too Much Time with Unavailable Men
When dating, there are certain relationships that are harmful and downright dangerous. These are relationships with unavailable men―the men who are not available or ready to have a meaningful relationship with a woman. This type of relationship has very little chance of long-term success. Many older wiser women have already been down this road, and they know better than to get involved with an unavailable man, but many younger women spend too many months and years with men that are unavailable. In my book, Why I Love Men, The Joys of Dating, I discuss the five types of unavailable men and clues to identify the unavailable man.
Mistake 4: Only DATE One Man at a Time
If you are not in a committed exclusive relationship, you should continue to have several guys as available date options. Having several men to date will build your confidence and self-esteem. It will allow you to hone your dating skills, such as improving your communication style on dates. We can date many men and enjoy their company until we find someone worth having a meaningful relationship with. If you meet a guy you like, don’t get rid of the others and focus all of your energy and efforts on the one man you like. It’s ok to have a prioritized order of the guys that you’re dating, and as you meet new guys that you like more, you just remove the least favorite date from the rotation. If the guy at the top of the list doesn’t call you, one of the others likely will. I would encourage you to learn to simply enjoy the company of men. Remember, I’m encouraging you to DATE, and not to have sex with many men. I’m not trying to encourage promiscuity. That is an individual choice that I personally do not advocate.
Mistake 5: Don’t Know Their Relationship Market Value (RMV)
Before you begin the dating process, it’s important to understand your Relationship Market Value (RMV). Your RMV helps you determine three things: (1) the characteristics that you bring to a relationship that can be of value or benefit to a mate; (2) what type of guys you can attract so that you can focus your efforts on finding that type of man; and (3) if you are ready for a relationship. When determining your Relationship Market Value, you take a close look at your mental/emotional health, financial health, family relationships and other areas of your life, and discover if you are really ready for a relationship. You determine your RMV by looking at the positive traits that you bring to a relationship, while evaluating the negative ones as well (those that may take something away or create challenges in a relationship). Determining your RMV is about being realistic regarding what you will be bringing into a relationship. The RMV Assessment Questionnaire can be completed in my new book, Why I Love Men: The Joys of Dating.
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