A man still holds a woman to a higher sexual standard than he holds for himself. Most men don’t want to think of their wife as promiscuous or easy. In fact, if he could delete all of her prior sexual experiences, he would. After you sleep with a man, the balance of power starts to shift in his favor. By sleeping with him on the first date, you could end the need for him to court or pursue you, and his primary interest in you could just be for sex.
Women generally don’t like to have sex on the first date, because we really don’t like being a victim of a “hit-and-run.” However, in this day and age, if you decide to have sex on the first date, it should be your own decision based upon want you want. You should already know that there is a good chance that he may not call you anymore, but that’s the chance you take. Men rarely turn down sex, and they don’t need to be in love or in a relationship with you to have sex. There are many women who feel that way about sex nowadays, too.
Having sex on the first date can sometimes depend on the circumstances. Let’s say you have a date with a guy, and it ends up lasting all day because you really hit it off quickly. Then “things” just happen. In that case, there’s a good chance he may want to continue seeing you. However, if you met him a club, and then had sex at about 4 a.m. at your place, there’s a very good chance you will not hear from him again. If you’re looking to just have fun with him, enjoy yourself. If you see him having some serious love potential, then it may make sense to wait. It is generally best to wait to have sex if you want him to consider you a serious long-term partner.
I have learned that men will be pretty honest about your sexual encounter if you ask them, outside the bedroom, of course. If you have sex with a guy, don’t make assumptions.
- Having sex with him doesn’t mean he will continue to call you or ever call you again.
- Having sex with him doesn’t mean he won’t be having sex with other women.
- Having sex with him doesn’t mean that you’re entering a committed relationship with him.
- Having sex with him doesn’t mean that getting to know you better will be a primary focus in his life.
If you find yourself in situations where you often have sex too soon, then we’ll assume holding out is not your strong suit. An easy suggestion for overcoming this is to not be physically ready to have sex when you go out on a date. This could include not shaving your legs or underarms, wearing big granny panties, or wearing clothes that are difficult to get out of. If you really don’t want to have sex with him, but you don’t trust yourself, then some of these tactics may work for you.
Based on every man that I know, I can tell you that having sex is very important to them. It might even be at the top of the list of their favorite things to do. You have to remember that men can have sex with a total stranger and find it physically enjoyable. Meanwhile, even though some women have gotten comfortable with having sex on the first date, they still are more likely to want and desire love from that person more than men. Women do want the physical enjoyment of sex, but they also desire the love and intimacy that comes through lovemaking. Sometimes we want love so bad, we confuse lovemaking with sex, but they are two different things. Lovemaking starts while you’re on your feet, when you love and care for a person. However, sex is the easy part, as it is a physical act for pleasure and enjoyment. Most people would agree that sex is even more fulfilling when it is accompanied by lovemaking, when deep feelings exist between the two people. So, you determine for yourself if sex on the first date makes sense for you!
J.J. Smith is a Dating Diva who offers a fresh perspective on dating and relationships that will help you create a wonderful life that attracts the best men for you and get the love you really want! To learn more about her highly anticipated book, Why I Love Men: The Joys of Dating, as well as other eBooks and free articles, visit www.jjsmithonline.com Copyright © 2009 J.J. Smith |
